THE TWO ELVISES - PART ONE (ORIGINAL SHORT STORY)

OK... I feel like I'm going out on a limb here. Very few people have read any fiction I've written, much less a story which happens to not be my particular favorite. In any case, a few days ago, I posted this poem. It was an ode to a teenaged Vegas elopement and the bar they visited soon after. After thinking about it, I figured it was the perfect companion piece to a short story I wrote eons ago about the same subject. If anything, the only thing I can say is that they ultimately belong together at this point. First this story, "The Two Elvises" which I'll post in three parts, and then the poem from the other day - Honeymoon at the Atomic.

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"We always deceive ourselves twice about the people we love - first to their advantage, then to their disadvantage."
- Albert Camus

"The Two Elvises"

"Which wedding package do you want?" the minister asked the couple.

"What do you mean?" the girl Carol answered.

As the boyfriend, Stu, caught a glimpse of the minister, he thought getting married in a gaudy Las Vegas chapel was going to be the final nail in their coffin. He didn't care. Somehow, he knew the two of them belonged there. For the past day or so, he kept thinking of their parents, who would never approve of something like this. Right now, their faces were engraved on his conscience.

The man of the cloth answered with a slight hint of Southern drawl, "Well, little lady, we here at the Twin Steeple Chapel have a variety of packages available on this most special of days."

"Like?" Stu said.

"Well, we can arrange anything from getting married at the highest or lowest point of the Grand Canyon to proclaiming your wedding vows in a hot air balloon over the Hoover Dam."

Carol's eyes lit up. "That sounds great huh, Baby?"

Stu just nodded at Carol. The boy knew, however, there was no way these would come cheap -- especially in this town. "But those are those expensive, huh?" he asked the minister.

"Well, they're far from free, son," he answered. "Tell you what, though, if you let me know how much ya'll two can spare, I'd be more than delighted to tell you what we got." Stu's attention was quickly diverted to the hundreds of Polaroids stapled to the walls of the cozy chapel. The brilliant rays of the Nevada sun were starting to turn the edges of some of the pictures a slight shade of yellow. But even with the discoloration, he could still easily see the many faces of the happy couples. He wondered how many of them were still married. How many were young like he and Carol? How many were drunk at the time? And, judging from some of the older folks tacked to the board, how many were still alive?

His concentration was broken. "I'm talking to you, Stu," Carol said, nudging him to pay attention.

"What?" he asked, not hearing her. "I'm listening... I'm listening..."

"He's waiting for us," Carol said before whispering into her boyfriend's ear. Stu waited a second and whispered back. Carol seemed disappointed and asked, "That's it? Are you sure that's all we can afford?"

"We're pushing it as it is," Stu said.

Carol turned the minister and told him, "We have about $150 to spare, father."

"I see," he said, nodding over and over.

"Not enough?" Stu asked.

"No, no, no" the minister quickly said. "It just doesn't leave us with many options, that's all. But don't worry, I'm sure we can accommodate you with something."

Stu held onto his girl's hand and said, "Well, we're all ears, father." Carol tickled his palm with her thumbnail. He loved that. It was his weakness and he gave her a sexy grin.

The minister flipped through a timeworn leather binder and said, "Now let's see, an even hundred dollars gets the two a ya'll married with a witness."

"Is that the best you could do for us?" Stu asked.

The minister apologetically shrugged his shoulders. "M'fraid so, son. I guess you could call it the 'The no-frills package.'"

Stu just wasn't sure. He had to justify the two of them spending that much cash. He wanted to get married and all, but a hundred bucks was, well, a hundred bucks.

"What do you think?" Carol asked him.

"Baby, we just got into town two days ago. We gotta watch what we spend."

Carol sighed. "Then let's just forget it."

Stu felt Carol's melodramatics beginning and turned towards the minister. "Just a witness? That's all we get for a hundred bucks?"

"Certainly not, son," he said, holding onto the lapels of his gray blazer. "We supply a beautiful wedding garter for the bride and provide authentic organ music for the ceremony."

"As opposed to 'non-authentic' organ music?" Stu asked.

"You'd be surprised at how many chapels here in our great city play tape cassettes on this most special of days," the minister said, pointing to the instrument. "The real McCoy. Ain't she just a beaut?"

Stu thought it looked like one of those hastily screwed together catalog organs from a Sears Christmas Wishbook.

"And that's not all," the minister went on, "what wedding wouldn't be complete without a genuine keepsake?"

"Which is?" Carol asked.

"We're proud to give the happy couple two memento Polaroids," the minister answered, pointing to the photos tacked to the wall.

"Just to satisfy my own curiosity, father," Stu said, "If we wanted a couple of the 'frills' tacked on, what would they be?"

The minister opened his rate book once more. "Now let's see, an upgraded package includes a bridal bouquet for the lucky lady, boutonnière for the groom and best man, corsage for the bridesmaid with lots of optional extras thrown in."

Optional extras? Somehow the two kids knew those two words just didn't belong together.

"What kind of 'optional extras' we talkin' about?" Stu asked.

"Well, just tons, son. We can videotape your wedding, hire a top-notch shutterbug, book ya'll a honeyroom --"

"Uh, what's a 'honeyroom?'" Carol asked.

"Sorry, the minister said smiling, "That's wedding chapel lingo for honeymoon suite. I like to think it sounds better my way."

Carol turned to Stu and, looking dejected, said, "I wanted this day to be really special"

Hearing her, the minister raised his forefinger. "We do have one more little package that's probably the most popular."

The kids' curiosity perked as they watched the minister fold his hands saying, "The Twin Steeple's Elvis Presley Wedding Package is unlike anything else on the grand boulevard known as the Las Vegas strip."

Stu held back a laugh and thought the minister was joking. "Elvis Presley? You gotta be kidding."

"He'll even sing 'Love Me Tender.' It's very sweet. Very sweet, indeed."

Stu looked around the chapel and the concept of marriage was just starting to sink in because he couldn't believe what he was about to do. He was in love, no doubt about it, but he was scared like all grooms-to-be and thought his fright had to be natural. He looked at Carol. Beautiful. But what the hell were they doing? And this minister. What planet did he come from with his sickening congeniality? Their impromptu act of love was supposed to be a spontaneous lark, and it was turning into sheer confusion. He couldn't even imagine what couples tying the knot with lavish receptions could go through. A part of him wanted to go back home. But he and Carol came a long way.

They had a point to prove.

TO BE CONTINUED ...